October 20th
Eutychus
On the first
day of the week, when we met to break bread, Paul was holding a discussion with
them; since he intended to leave the next day, he continued speaking until
midnight. There were many lamps in the room upstairs where
we were meeting. A young man named Eutychus, who was sitting in
the window, began to sink off into a deep sleep while Paul talked still longer.
Overcome by sleep, he fell to the ground three floors below and was picked up
dead. But Paul went down, and bending over him took him
in his arms, and said, “Do not be alarmed, for his life is in him.” Then Paul went upstairs, and after he had broken
bread and eaten, he continued to converse with them until dawn; then he
left. Meanwhile they had taken the boy away alive and
were not a little comforted.
Acts 20:7-12
The
moral here? Don’t fall asleep in church,
especially if you sit in the balcony.
Okay, so that is not really the central message of the passage, but it
was something that the pastor would warn us about when we sat in the church’s
upper section.
I
like this story. I know this story. I’ve lived this story. Not the actual falling/death/resurrection
part, but the scene is very familiar.
There is something going on at the front of the room that is engaging
and interesting and stimulating and every eye is focused on what is happening. At the back of the room, another drama is
developing as a young boy is doing something that will distract from the other
activities. The back of the room is
where the special needs families live.
At
church we would sit next to the sanctuary exits or up in the balcony so that if
my son got too loud or energetic, we would not be ruining anyone else’s Sunday
morning. At staff conferences I would
pace back and forth in the back of the room, carrying my son or bouncing him or
swinging his car seat back and forth as I tried rocking him to sleep. It is hard to be a part of a strategic
conversation with 45 other people. It is
significantly harder when your attention is divided between following the
dialogue and entertaining a two year old autistic boy. I sang “The Wheels on the Bus” under my
breath to my son as we walked thousands of times in those meetings.
The
back of the room is for people who want to be a part of the movement but cannot
engage fully and want to leave space for others to participate without
distraction. The back of the room can be
lonely and isolating and you sometimes wonder if you are doing anyone any good
or if you should just go find something else to do. But there is no room that is any easier.
When
I drop my daughter off at 1st grade I walk her to class. I often see the common area with the lights
turned out and a man with a 3rd grade boy pacing. They are alone and they are trying to figure
out what to do in order to help the boy re-engage with his peers. I know that story as well. The dark room is where you go when the back
of the room is insufficient. It is a
dim, quiet place where energy can be worked out without bothering others. It is a room where strategies are developed
and social skills are worked on and loins are girded to try again.
To
Paul’s credit, he checked on the drama that occurred in the back of the
room. The boy that fell out of the
window was dead…but he got better. Paul
checked on him and then went back to the front of the room to keep teaching and
debating. The boy was alive and the
people felt relieved that God had done a miracle and the all-nighter had not
morphed into a tragedy.
God
sees the back of the room and all its residents. He sees the effort to stay. He sees the creativity to engage. He sees the fear of rejection and
isolation. He sees the late arrivals and
early departures and hears every single shush.
For those of us who live our lives in the back of the room, I simply
offer this: God hangs out there
too. The message that He speaks back
there may be different than the one that is coming from up front, but it is
real and it is authentic and it is spoken by God specifically for you and your
heart. Do what you need to do…go when
you need to go…but know that while every eye in the building may be facing
forward, God’s attention is squarely focused on you and your child.
A moment to reflect:
Offer encouragement to someone who resides in
the back of the room this week. I know
you see them; let them know that you see them as well.
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