August 1st

The Empty Tomb

             Early on the first day of the week, while it was still dark, Mary Magdalene came to the tomb and saw that the stone had been removed from the tomb.  So she ran and went to Simon Peter and the other disciple, the one whom Jesus loved, and said to them, “They have taken the Lord out of the tomb, and we do not know where they have laid him.” Then Peter and the other disciple set out and went toward the tomb. The two were running together, but the other disciple outran Peter and reached the tomb first.  He bent down to look in and saw the linen wrappings lying there, but he did not go in.  Then Simon Peter came, following him, and went into the tomb. He saw the linen wrappings lying there, and the cloth that had been on Jesus’ head, not lying with the linen wrappings but rolled up in a place by itself. Then the other disciple, who reached the tomb first, also went in, and he saw and believed; for as yet they did not understand the scripture, that he must rise from the dead.  Then the disciples returned to their homes.

John 20:1-10

             

            I like knowing.  Or rather…I hate not knowing.  There is very little fun for me in surprises or exploring or trying new things because it brings me face to face with my ignorance.  I happened to marry someone who is on the other end of that spectrum and one of the recurring episodes of our marriage is her boldly heading towards the unknown while I drag my feet.  It has been incredibly good for me and a lot of fun, but it has never gotten easier.

            I feel for the disciples in this passage.  In the span of a few short days, everything that they knew and expected about life with Jesus has been blown apart.  One of their own betrayed Him?  Jesus, who had dazzled everyone with his intellect and eloquence, could not talk His way out of an obviously contrived trial?  The One who had power over health and spirits and death and the elements could not escape a few soldiers with swords and ended up being crucified?  Jesus was dead?

            Jesus was dead.  Even as they were trying to wrap their minds around this, word came that the tomb was empty.  Peter and John investigated…but that did not make anything more clear.  Jesus was dead…but He had risen…or God had taken His body away…or someone else had taken His body away…or something else had happened?  What were they supposed to do now?  There was no manual for this; Jesus had not left behind any instructions for Disciples who were in hiding after the assassination of their Master.  They went home full of questions…and the spark of something else.  They may not have known how this story would end after all.  There may still be hope and a life worth living.

            I have felt just as lost raising my children.  Every day seems to be filled with more entries into “The Book of Things that James Does Not Know.”  Navigating emotions.  Navigating food sensitivities.  Navigating sensory sensitivities.  Navigating sleep and school and internet use and sibling interactions and faith and future.  It often feels like my family is rafting down white water rapids and we have no idea where the shallows are or what is around the next bend or where the sweepers are lurking.  For someone who hates not knowing, it can be incredibly stressful and exhausting.  And yet…

            And yet…just like the disciples, I have this hunch…this vague feeling that there is more going on in this story that I do not know.  There is a faint ray of hope that perhaps the unknown does not hold failure and disappointment and pain.  There is the possibility that the unknown that we are heading into may actually be filled with adventure and laughter and joy.  There is a possibility that God has us in a story that is bigger and better than anything that I can imagine. 

            I do not know what the future holds for me or for my son or for the rest of my family.  I don’t know what challenges will arise or what opportunities may present themselves.  I do not know and I hate that…and I have to find some way to be okay with that.  I have to find some way to enter into the unknown with hope.  The world is changing.  My kids will not be children for much longer.  All that is certain is that life will be different…and God is already in the unknown, waiting for us.  Wherever my kids go, whatever challenges we face, Jesus is already there and making a way for us.  There is no unknown or unexpected for Him.  The tomb was empty.  The disciples were bewildered.  But even while they were confused, Jesus was laying the foundations for their understanding and transformation.

  

A moment to reflect:

Where do you feel confused and hopeless?  Ask Jesus where He is in the midst of those things.