12/2/21

 Did I ask for This?

                 When the child was older, he went out one day to his father among the reapers.  He complained to his father, “Oh, my head, my head!” The father said to his servant, “Carry him to his mother.”  He carried him and brought him to his mother; the child sat on her lap until noon, and he died.  She went up and laid him on the bed of the man of God, closed the door on him, and left.  Then she called to her husband, and said, “Send me one of the servants and one of the donkeys, so that I may quickly go to the man of God and come back again…

            When the man of God saw her coming, he said to Gehazi his servant, “Look, there is the Shunammite woman; run at once to meet her, and say to her, Are you all right? Is your husband all right? Is the child all right?” She answered, “It is all right.”  When she came to the man of God at the mountain, she caught hold of his feet. Gehazi approached to push her away. But the man of God said, “Let her alone, for she is in bitter distress; the Lord has hidden it from me and has not told me.”  Then she said, “Did I ask my lord for a son? Did I not say, Do not mislead me…”

            When Elisha came into the house, he saw the child lying dead on his bed.  So he went in and closed the door on the two of them, and prayed to the Lord. Then he got up on the bed and lay upon the child, putting his mouth upon his mouth, his eyes upon his eyes, and his hands upon his hands; and while he lay bent over him, the flesh of the child became warm.  He got down, walked once to and fro in the room, then got up again and bent over him; the child sneezed seven times, and the child opened his eyes.  Elisha summoned Gehazi and said, “Call the Shunammite woman.” So he called her. When she came to him, he said, “Take your son.” She came and fell at his feet, bowing to the ground; then she took her son and left.

2 Kings 4:18-37

             Is God mean?  Is He petty?  Does He simply manipulate the lives of mortals for His own entertainment and amusement?  Why would He perform a miracle that allowed this woman to have a son and then take the son away from her a few short years later?

            My daughter is reading The Odyssey in school.  The Greek gods are famous for meddling in the lives of humanity for their own purposes.  They are always competing against each other or jealous or think that a woman is really pretty and so they descend to earth and give gifts or blow up people’s lives.  The real God can’t be like that?  Can He?

            Some will say that God is goodness and God is love and so anything that He does is inherently good and loving.  Some will say that everything has a reason and a plan and it will all work out for good.  Some will say that God knows everything and life may have been much worse if the circumstances of our lives were different.  Those arguments all seem to be heavy on hindsight and mistake God’s redemption for God’s plan.  They do not address the parent drowning in despair because of the loss of their child.  They do not relieve the fear and the guilt of a special needs parent who is trying to figure out the why’s of the situation that they are in.

            I didn’t ask for this.  I did not ask to step into the world of autism.  I did not ask for a child that would challenge me and grow me in these ways.  Have I become a better man and a better father and a better disciple than I was before?  Definitely.  Did I want my character to grow?  Absolutely.  Is my son’s diagnosis tied to what God was growing inside of me?  I don’t think so…I hope not.  I don’t want to be the reason that autism fell on him.

            Two pieces jump out to me as I look at this passage.  First is that what happens to the boy is not directly about the mother.  What happens to our children is not all about us.  Autism is not a lesson to improve my character or a punishment for my mistakes.  Their diagnosis cannot be all about how it makes our lives harder or how sad it makes us.  It is not all about us.

            Second is that God is more interested in relationship with us than he is in our lives being pain-free.  Challenges that God sends our way are intended to draw us closer to Him.  God is more concerned that we spend an eternity in relationship with Him then us spending 75 easy years in these bodies but never coming to know Him.

            These two can feel contradictory.  A large part of that is because we do not know how many of our circumstances are sent by God, how many are sent by the enemy and how many are just the result of living in a fallen world.  We don’t know and we won’t fully know until eternity, but as I read through this passage, it does not seem like Elisha or God are just toying with the woman.  They are sympathetic and gentle and eager to pick her up in her time of distress.

            That sounds like the God we know…right?

A moment to reflect:

Is God manipulative?  Why do you think that?