May 29th

Ezra

            And Nehemiah, who was the governor, and Ezra the priest and scribe, and the Levites who taught the people said to all the people, “This day is holy to the Lord your God; do not mourn or weep.” For all the people wept when they heard the words of the law.  Then he said to them, “Go your way, eat the fat and drink sweet wine and send portions of them to those for whom nothing is prepared, for this day is holy to our Lord; and do not be grieved, for the joy of the Lord is your strength.” So the Levites stilled all the people, saying, “Be quiet, for this day is holy; do not be grieved.” And all the people went their way to eat and drink and to send portions and to make great rejoicing, because they had understood the words that were declared to them.

Nehemiah 8:9-13

Correction.  Being told that you are wrong and how to improve have always been really hard for me.  Not surprisingly, it is incredibly hard for my children as well.  My kids are all for doing the assignment or project but when you tell them that there are edits that need to happen on the paper or corrections that need to be made on the math or further cleaning that needs to be done in their area…there are feelings.  Big feelings.  The “I-thought-you-loved-me-but-now-that-you-are-criticizing-my-work-I-wonder-if-I-have-any-self-worth-or-value” kind of feelings.  If my son and I spent an hour a night on math homework in elementary school, 40 minutes of that hour were spent navigating the sadness that he had over being told that he did not do the problem right.

How do you teach someone when they are in crisis?  The simple answer is that you cannot.  I learned that from working with high-risk youth.  I learned that from working with the IDD community.  I learned that working in college ministry.  It was true for all of them and it was true for my son.  When big emotions and panic are streaming through your veins, it is difficult to learn anything and nearly impossible to retain it.  Before you can proceed with the lesson, the emotions need to be managed.  That could look like taking breaks and doing some relaxing activities.  That could look like getting a snack or listening to music or setting up a space specifically for teaching.  That could look like setting expectations before starting, whether saying that you will do this activity for a certain amount of time or a certain number of problems or that you will redo it until a certain level of success is achieved.  Once we have managed the expectations and the emotions, there is potential to learn…we just need to remember that this is as much a part of the learning process as the right curriculum or course of study.

It is generally the same for us.  When we are in crisis, it is almost impossible to learn new things, academically or spiritually.  We could hear the most amazing sermon or sit in an incredibly bible study, but if our mind is scattered and our hearts are weighed down with anxiety and panic, nothing will sink in.  If we are consumed by anger and revenge, there is no room for God to grow and develop us.  If we are caught up in perfectionism and fear that correction is just the first step in God’s rejection of us, we will leave no space to hear His voice.  First we allow God to speak peace to our hearts and our minds, then we are free and able to learn what he has for us.

A moment to reflect:

Remember what is true.  Remember that God created you and loves you deeply.  Allow Him to speak peace and then ask if there are things that He wants you to learn.