July 26

Unless a Grain of Wheat Falls

             Now among those who went up to worship at the festival were some Greeks. They came to Philip, who was from Bethsaida in Galilee, and said to him, “Sir, we wish to see Jesus.”  Philip went and told Andrew; then Andrew and Philip went and told Jesus.  Jesus answered them, “The hour has come for the Son of Man to be glorified.  Very truly, I tell you, unless a grain of wheat falls into the earth and dies, it remains just a single grain; but if it dies, it bears much fruit.  Those who love their life lose it, and those who hate their life in this world will keep it for eternal life.  Whoever serves me must follow me, and where I am, there will my servant be also. Whoever serves me, the Father will honor.  Now my soul is troubled. And what should I say—‘Father, save me from this hour’? No, it is for this reason that I have come to this hour.  Father, glorify your name.”

            Then a voice came from heaven, “I have glorified it, and I will glorify it again.” The crowd standing there heard it and said that it was thunder.

John 12:20-29

             Sometimes the simplest images are really the best teachers.  A single kernel of wheat will not yield much food.  If that kernel is placed in the ground and allowed to transform into something else…if that kernel dies, then it can grow into a new plant that yields a great crop.  Apple seeds, sunflower seeds, watermelon seeds, lemon seeds.  They all contain the ingredients to become so much more than they are as we hold them in our hands.  The kernel has immense potential inside of it which will never be realized as long as it remains a kernel.  Letting go of the old and embracing the transformation have to occur for a seed to become a plant or a tree or a vine.

            This is true of our lives as well, on a few different levels.  Clearly when we die and are given new bodies in eternity, there will be a tremendous change.  But this image is true for our life in the here and now as well.  We all have dreams and desires.  We all have things that make us comfortable and uncomfortable.  We have our ideal lives and patterns and an idea of how we want our days to go.  In order to use the same verbiage that Jesus is using, let’s say that the way that we want to spend our time and our money and our energy is called our “Life.”

            We can choose to save our life or lose it.  We can choose to use all of our resources in exactly the ways that we want to.  We can do what we want, when we want, for how long we want, with whom we want.  Lots of people do that.

            Or we can allow that Life to die by choosing the needs and desires of others ahead of ourselves.  This is the heart of marriage and parenting and discipleship. We can choose to watch “Dora and Friends,” with our kids instead of the newest action movie that just came out.  We can choose to have scrambled eggs and gluten free toast for dinner again because that’s what our kids can eat.  We can choose to go to garage sales with our spouse instead of the big game with our friends.  Each of these is allowing part of our Life to die so that something bigger and better can live.  If everything is about me and what I want, relationships will always be stunted. 

            Do you know why parenting a special needs kid is so hard?  Because you can feel yourself being transformed.  You can feel the old you dying and the new you being created on the spot.  We are the kernel in the ground that is losing its old shape and title and identity as something new begins to grow.  We don’t do the same things that we used to.  We don’t go to the same places that we used to go.  We don’t think the same.  We don’t talk the same.  Our old Life is actively dying and being replaced with something new. 

            It happens in our parenting and it happens in our relationship with Jesus.  He strips away the old Life and creates something that is bigger and better and more amazing.  Transformation can be a terrifying process to go through.  We can be mad or sad or resentful or anxious.  We can long for the good old days when we could sleep when we wanted and eat what we desired.  However, Life on the other side of the transformation is beautiful and powerful and happens to be where the richness of life is found.

A moment to reflect:

How have you been dying and being transformed?